Adult Respite: Relief for Parents of an Adult Child

Adult respite is short-term care that gives a family caregiver a break from caring for an adult with a disability or serious health need. For many families, the caregivers are aging parents who have cared for a son or daughter with a disability for decades and are now in their 70s or 80s themselves. Respite can come into the home for a few hours, take place at a day program, or be a short overnight stay. It protects the parents' health today, and it helps the whole family plan for the day they can't do it anymore.

Your brother has Down syndrome and has always lived with Mom and Dad. Dad is 78 and just had heart surgery. Mom is exhausted. They've never asked for help, and they've never talked about what happens next. You live an hour away and know it's time to start.

Why respite matters for aging parents

• Their own health. Lifting, bathing, and watching over an adult child gets harder every year.
• Their own appointments, surgeries, and recovery.
• Rest. Many parents haven't had a real break in years.
• Practice for the future. Respite lets your sibling get used to other caregivers while Mom and Dad are still there to help.

Kinds of adult respite

In-home respite. A trained caregiver comes to the home, for a few hours, overnight, or longer. Your sibling keeps their routines, room, and things, which matters a lot for many adults with disabilities. See short-term respite care.

Day programs. Activities, social time, and supervision during the day.

Short overnight stays in a licensed setting. See respite homes: preparing for a short stay.

How families pay in Utah

• Utah's Division of Services for People with Disabilities (DSPD) provides services, which can include respite, for eligible Utahns with intellectual or physical disabilities. There may be a waiting list, so apply early.
• Medicaid waiver programs may cover respite for people who qualify.
• Private pay.
• Ask any respite provider whether they're approved for your family's program before you start.

For more on personal care and paying for help, see personal care for disabled people.

Getting started

1. Start small. A few hours a week with the same caregiver builds trust.
2. Write a one-page guide to your sibling: routines, likes, dislikes, how they communicate, what calms them, and what upsets them.
3. Overlap at first. Have Mom or Dad there for the first visits.
4. Keep it consistent. The same day, the same time, and the same person when possible.

For choosing a provider, see respite provider: green flags and red flags.

Planning for what comes next

The hardest conversation is about the future. Start it while your parents can still lead it:

• Who will be the main caregiver or guardian if Mom and Dad can't?
• Where will your sibling live? At home with help, with a sibling, or in a supported living setting?
• What legal documents are needed? Guardianship or alternatives, powers of attorney, and a special needs trust are worth discussing with an attorney.
• Write a letter of intent: everything your parents know about your sibling's care, preferences, doctors, and daily life.
• Make sure siblings know the plan, and who does what.

Where help at home fits

Our Care Professionals provide in-home respite: they come to the family home, follow your sibling's routines, help with personal care, meals, and activities, and give Mom and Dad time to rest, go to appointments, or recover. Most are certified nursing assistants, and your family gets a small, consistent team, so your sibling sees familiar faces. Overlap visits are easy to set up, shifts can be as short as four hours, and there are no contracts. When your parents need help themselves, we can help them too. See how respite care works. See how everyday help at home works.

What to do next

1. Talk with your parents about a first, small break.
2. Apply early for DSPD or Medicaid waiver services if your sibling may qualify.
3. Write the one-page guide, and set up an overlap visit.
4. Start the conversation about the future, and write it down.
5. Look at all our home care services, or see your exact price in 30 seconds.

Need help for someone in your family? See your price in 30 seconds, or call us to talk it through.

This article is general information, not medical, legal, or financial advice. Talk with a qualified professional about your situation.